


You Fill My Lungs With Sweetness

by wingless



Category: Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: Episode Tag, F/F, First Kiss, Love Confessions, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-15
Updated: 2017-05-15
Packaged: 2018-11-01 02:07:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10912140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wingless/pseuds/wingless
Summary: A few things occur to Riko, just then, right after the words come out of her mouth; one, that this is so not what she meant to say, and not what she was planning on saying, but that it doesn't make it any less true; two is a repetitive reminder to herself tostop talking, right here, that's quite enough; the third is really just pure panic.





	You Fill My Lungs With Sweetness

**Author's Note:**

> Set after Episode 10.

A few things occur to Riko, just then, right after the words come out of her mouth; one, that this is so not what she meant to say, and not what she was planning on saying, but that it doesn't make it any less true; two is a repetitive reminder to herself to _stop talking, right here, that's quite enough_ ; the third is really just pure panic.

It was the heat of the moment, really. The heat of the moment, the charge of emotion, and everything Riko wanted to say translating into words that came out of their own before Riko thought of them. It's one of those things that seem like a good idea at the time. But when the moment passes, the split second it dawns on her what she just said, so passes the impulse that drew these words out of her mouth. And whatever train of thought she was following drives straight into a dead end and crashes;  all rational thought and any capacity for words drowned out with what must be the mental equivalent of a scream. It's not unlike the blaring of a siren, or the deafening noise of a fire alarm; every instinct and nerve, sending alarm signals her way, and Riko, calm, down-to-earth Riko, the very picture of composure and self control, who always knows how to keep her cool and act under pressure—  in response, Riko freezes.

If she could scream, she probably would, maybe, except this is the sort of panic that drowns out all action and thought and even that she can't manage right now.

"Um," Riko says, feeling her face grow hot to the tips of her ears, while the rest of her body freezes in place, and the world practically spins around her and though she's aware of Chika looking at her and that she is looking at Chika back, suddenly actually _looking_ at Chika is far too overwhelming, and though she's looking she can't actually see anything through all the panic blurring her vision, and wow it sure is warm for so early in the morning? She's sweating like it's midday, and she should get her hands away from Chika's, they're getting sweaty and gross now too and she doesn't want Chika to feel that—

"Riko-chan?" Through the fog of her vision, Riko catches Chika looks down at both their hands in confusion, perfectly oblivious like Riko didn't just maybe accidentally possibly confess her love even though it was quite honestly the last thing she meant to do. Okay, Riko thinks to herself, okay, so there still remains the distinct possibility that Riko's choice of phrase was vague enough for Chika to have naturally understood her meaning differently.

This should probably help subside the panic, or wash at least some of it away, and it absolutely does not, and Riko fights through the swamp of her mental state to try regain some control over her frozen body. "Sorry about that," she says, turning away from Chika's field of vision, fiddling with her hands and wow, they really are all sweaty and warm. "Actually, that was very strange of me, wasn't it? I just made things awkward. Please forget it." How she sounds so steady and calm through the screaming panic of her insides, Riko herself does not now. Legs shaking, unsteady, Riko barely manages to bring herself to sit down to maybe try calm her insanely beating heart. "I just wanted to say that—  that—  I..."

Riko wanted to say so many things. She wanted to say _thank you_ , and also, _I can't believe you_ , and _you're too good to me, I'm so happy to have met you_ , and it's always like this with Chika; it's only with her that Riko finds herself at the precipice of emotions words can't summarize, and everything she wants to say, a heady mix of  joy and awe and gratitude with disbelief at how Chika could be so _her_ , always coming out as _You're so strange._ It's just— this time it was more than that, and it didn't seem to express it quite enough, and hugging her didn't seem to express it quite enough, and she wanted to say so much, she wanted to cry and hold Chika's hands in her own for hours right then, and somehow all of it came out as _I love you_.

Which, still, with every passing second of Riko's panic, does not stop being any less true, and actually puts a lot of what Riko wanted to say into words, because this right here, everything Chika said to her and did for her in those words is everything that Riko—  well. She can't pretend that it's not. It's everything she loves in her, and it's all the reasons why, and that's the truth, except Chika isn't supposed to know.

A moment of silence passes where Riko can't look at Chika; and then she feels moment beside her. When she looks to the side, Chika is sitting down, a curious glance her way. "Why weird? I liked hearing it." Chika leans in, voice soft, unusually quiet. "It was nice."

_Oh,_ Riko thinks. _Oh._ Does that mean—  no. Does she really dare to hope...? Chika's hand reaches out for Riko's, where it sits shaking like the rest of her in her lap. Riko is terribly warm and terribly cold at once, heat flooding her to the very tips of her ears even as she shivers like she's going to freeze, but the grasp of Chika's soft hand steadies her a bit. Riko dares to steal a glance at Chika through the curtain of her hair and meets a soft, subdued expression she's not used to seeing.

"Riko-chan," Chika whispers. "I hope you mean what I think you meant." Riko's heart is pounding until she feels it, heavy and hard, through her chest to her throat, feels the vibrations and rushing blood through her head and her terribly warm ears. "If you didn't, I'll forget it. But if you did..." Chika's other hand reaches for a strand of Riko's hair. She holds it and twirls it in her hand, that very light motion sending a ripple of a strange something through all of Riko.

"If," Riko gulps and turns to look at Chika again. "If I did mean it? Then?"

Chika is smiling, gentle, shy, but bright and happy, and it's such a sight—  she leans in, and Riko's heart might actually stop? The hand that was playing with her hair presses to Riko's cheek softly, "It would make me very happy."

It's all if all time stops, as if all the world reduced to this; Chika's smile, the softness of her hand, the shy giddiness in her voice, and her words.

"R... really?"

"From the moment I saw you," Chika lowers her eyes, and Riko catches a tinge of bashfulness in her expression. "I thought you were incredibly beautiful. I've seen many beautiful girls in my life, you know! Many. Everyone in Aqours is really beautiful too. But you, Riko... are really something special. So beautiful I don't have any words for it."

_How_ does she do this? Riko's sitting here, barely managing to get any words out through all the overwhelming intensity of— all this, and she just—  says it, just like that, so plainly? Riko pulls away from Chika's careful touch, and shaky, embarrassed laughter breaks out of her throat on its own. She looks down, fingers in her hair and digging into her scalp, palms passing over burning ears.

"W... wow, Chika. That's..." A gulp. "That's really, really embarrassing."

And Chika laughs; from the corner of her eye, Riko sees Chika rubbing her hand on the back of her neck. "I guess it is, isn't it? It's true, though! I mean it. All of it."

The truth of the matter is, Riko gets complimented on her looks a lot. Gets called beautiful all the time. She's gotten used it, by now; it's a nice thing to hear, of course, but nothing extraordinary. Except when Chika says it, in such a flowery, mushy way, it makes Riko's head swim, makes her go light-headed makes the world spin around her.

It's just so much. Chika, herself, is so much. But then again, what else is new? She always is. That's what makes her Chika. And Riko wouldn't have it any other way.

Riko hears Chika shuffle closer to her, leaning in closer until her breath tickles her ear just so, and Riko, still staring at her lap and the ground beneath her, can only gather the courage for a single hesitant glance her way.

"Riko-chan," a little whisper. "Talk to me. What is it? Is something wrong?"

In response, Chika gets  a fierce shake of the head.

"I... I'm sorry. Nothing wrong, it's just—  this is just—  this is just so much and I don't even know where to begin, I don't know how to deal with it, it's just so— " A deep breath. "I can't believe this is happening!"

Ringing laughter. "Come on! Really? You know it's all you, right? The one who made it happen in the first place?"

"It's because—  it's because of you!" Embarrassment forgotten, Riko turns back to look at Chika, gesticulating wildly in indignant frustration. "It's because you're just so—  so— "

"Weird, right?"

"Weird! And amazing! And sweet and good and wonderful and I just...!"

Chika is grinning from ear to ear, eyes twinkling fondly, and she's so _much_ and so _Chika_ that Riko can only let out a loud, frustrated noise.

"And I just want to kiss you!" It comes out of her so impulsively, so hastily, that Riko doesn't realize what she's saying until the words are out of her.

More laughter comes from Chika, but this time, it's softer, quieter, a little shaky. Riko isn't quite certain but she thinks Chika might be turning a little red. Riko, for one, is certain the color of her cheeks must match her hair at this point.

"Well," Chika say, sand she scoots closer and grabs Riko's shoulders and leans in close, so close, and this is actually happening, and Riko is _going to die_.

Chika kisses her, presses her lips to Riko's unsteadily, carefully, betraying her own share of- is it nervousness or shyness, Riko doesn't know. All she knows is that she kisses her back with the same cautiousness even though she's positively giddy, her whole body alight with a striking mix of delight and disquiet, pure energy and thrill so intense she can't decipher where her nervousness ends and happiness begins. Chika holds her, wraps her warms around her, warm, soft, comforting, and who is Riko not to return it?

And this—  right here. This is everything she wants, right now. To hold Chika in her arms and kiss her nervously and see her joy and her smile, and all the rest of the world and everything else is but a mere thought at the back of her mind.

If Riko is going to die, right here, she's going to die feeling more alive than ever, and she's going to die with Chika kissing her, _because_ of Chika kissing her, so all in all, not a bad death. She'd really have liked to go to that piano competition before that, and perform with Aqours a bit more, of course. Perform with Chika a bit more. Not to mention to kiss Chika some more, and then go on some dates with Chika, and maybe do some things more than kissing, later, of course, when they're both ready and probably a bit older? You don't just rush into something so special.

But point is, dying with Chika's lips on her own, not a bad way to go, and with the way Riko is shaking and her entire face heats up, she sure feels like it could happen any moment. Even when Chika breaks apart the kiss after God knows how long, so they could both get some air, Riko sure doesn't feel any calmer. Then Chika looks at her with this sweet, bashful smile, and Riko might just stop breathing, right there.

So she does the only thing she can think of, and turns away, and curls up into herself, hugging her knees and desperately trying to regain some semblance of control over her shaking limbs. "Oh my _god_ ," she breathes out, and, again. "Oh my g _od_. We just. We did that. I. I kissed. We kissed. You kissed me. And _I kissed you_."

A shameless giggle. bright and sweet and beyond and unfairly adorable, rings in Riko's ears. "I know! Riko!" She jumps and embraces her and it's really, really not helping Riko calm down. Neither is this:

"Riko! I'm so happy! Does this mean you're my girlfriend now? I want you to be my girlfriend ! I want to be _your_ girlfriend! We can go on dates now and be together all the time, and you'll hold my hand and we'll do even more kissing!"

Squeezed so tight in Chika's arms, feeling her warm soft skin against her own, Riko might just faint, and not because of a lack of air.

"I," She says instead. "Um. Yes." An answer to all of these, at once. "...Yes."

Chika's grip around her relaxes, after a short while; Riko is, frankly, a little disappointed for a moment, before it's replaced by Chika leaning on her, head resting on her shoulder. When she turns to face her, Chika looks—  content. Utterly relaxed, as if Riko's shoulder is the most comfortable place in the whole world.

It lasts for a short eternity.  A very, very short eternity.

Before Chika's eyes fly wide open as if she's been struck, and she jumps up, mouth open wide, and yells, "Oh my god! We need to get back! Like right now! It's already morning and I bet everyone is wondering where we are and— "

Riko, for her part, couldn't care less right now. She stands up and watches Chika freak out for a moment, lets her panic run its course. When Chika grabs her by the arm and pulls at her, leading her where she wants, as she always does, Riko lets her. As she always does, and always will.


End file.
